“I was dressed as Santa, getting killed by a doll, on a set in Romania, thinking: ‘Where did it go wrong?’” Jason Flemyng (Seed of Chucky–Child’s Play 5)

More pictures around Tintagel—-at least the ones that aren’t about today’s topic which is part II of THE REALLY BAD MOVIES OF ALL TIMES.

And then stay tune with our effort to help you and ME get through DROUGHTLANDER

“I took the film because I have grandchildren now, and I get to ride around on a giant bumblebee.” Michael Caine (Journey 2: The Mysterious Island)

GUNS AND HOSES FIREFIGHTERS ORLANDO FL. BLOOD DRIVE TEE S… (262789980175) $9.86

Our first movie has nothing to write home about

THE BEAST OF YUCCA FLATS

is screen fiction at its worse—maybe surly fiction instead of science…what ever. Our star….who probably looks better with the monster make up….is a Russian Scientist who after he defects somehow ends us, while fleeing the KGB, setting off an atomic bomb which he just happens to also be in the bomb’s area which results into turning him into a beast (bombs do that, yeah they do). Critic have described the rest of the movie as random scenes some entirely unrelated to the plot in general or the movie in particular.

“It’s the worst film I have ever made. Now, when my kids get out of line, they’re sent to their room and forced to watch Red Sonja ten times.’” Arnold Schwarzenegger

This movie made 1980’s audience stay away in Large numbers

HEAVEN’S GATE

(Not to be confused with the cult)

Described as Robert Ebert as painful and unpleasant. This flawed movie cost 36 million dollars to make and that included the photography described as Poor and was pulled early from it’s debut run and pared from 240 min to 140, which did change the reviews from HORRIBLE to insipid. While I don’t think that’s what they had in mind it might have been a bit of an improvement in that the audience was abused for that 100 extra minutes. Stars included Christopher Walken, John Hurt and the main man Kris Kristofferson. The story was about a young man (men?) from Harvard who went to Civilize the western part of America. He might have been better off if he’d stayed in England (where the Harvard scenes were filmed—did I miss something there as I thought it was Oxford in England…hum) or as Ebert also said: “It is the most scandalous cinematic waste I have ever seen.”

But there was one other movie that for many was the peace de resistance that year

MOMMY DEAREST

This movie who starred Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford, who made Cinderella’s Step mom seem compared to our movie star with a thing about metal hangers and had a cleanliness thing that would have driven many of my head nurses mad.

“I made a picture called Super Mario Bros., and my six-year-old son at the time — he’s now 18 — he said, ‘Dad I think you’re probably a pretty good actor, but why did you play that terrible guy King Koopa in Super Mario Bros.?’ And I said, ‘Well Henry, I did that so you could have shoes,’ and he said, ‘Dad, I don’t need shoes that badly.’” Dennis Hopper

A movie made from a TV show on Nickelodeon never a good sign

THE LAST AIRBENDERS

This movie by M. Night Shyamalan

has a lot of complaints about it including the change to Caucasian actors from the original production where they were Occidental. Described by the critics as “without joy, wonder or even humor.” which definitely want to go out and pick it up to show to all the kids I know. In fact the best reviews I found were from Europe where they found it not to be “as catastrophic” as the US critics said it was but they went on to call it “disappointing” and “chunky”

“People ask me why I’m playing in this picture. The answer is simple: Money, dear boy. I’m like a vintage wine. You have to drink me quickly before I turn sour. I’m almost used up now and I can feel the end coming. That’s why I’m taking money now. I’ve got nothing to leave my family but the money I can make from films. Nothing is beneath me if it pays well. I’ve earned the right to damn well grab whatever I can in the time I’ve got left.” Lawrence Olivia (Inchon)

Now before I get to the worst movie of all time I thought I’d give you 3 other 1990’s movies that are considered to be really (if not the worst)

Troll 2

The plot concerns a family pursued by vegetarian goblins who seek to transform them into plants so that they can eat them. REALLY!!!

Wikipedia says: “considered to be of exceptionally poor quality, and has come to be regarded by the public as one of the worst films ever made. The film has a 6% on Rotten Tomatoes.”

Enough said.

WELL MAYBE NOT:

They even made a movie about the movie and the people who made it–a group of unknown Utah actors who are celebrated for their ineptitude in his production which is done by Michael Paul Stephens, who was a child star in the movie.

Another is

Highlander 2

While the first was a classic, the 2nd is a worst …..

the review says it all:

Finally another of those movies I like that was really horrible—even the main man—ah bat??? makes jokes about how bad it was.

BATMAN & ROBIN

George Clooney Apologizes (Again) for ‘Batman & Robin’

“Every bad decision I’ve made has been based on money. I grew up in the projects and you don’t turn down money there. You take it, because you never know when it’s all going to end. I made Cop III because they offered me $15 million. That $15 million was worth having Roger Ebert’s thumb up my ass.” Eddie Murphy

And my choice (Wikipedia named Troll 2) for WORST MOVIE EVER

Where a devotee to a —sect—is Scientology a religion or what…

Got it: a religious system (???) based on the seeking of self-knowledge and spiritual fulfillment through graded courses of study and training. It was founded by American science fiction writer L. Ron Hubbard (1911–86) in 1955.

BATTLEFIELD EARTH

based on a novel by L. Ron Howard and starring at least one of his devotees John Travolta I don’t know where to start….the make up is ugh….not that it isn’t done well, it’s just well ugh….Rotten Tomato called it “ugly, campy and poorly acted” as well as “stunningly misguided and aggressively bad. “

If you can pick a better word than UGH go ahead…and those COD pieces…..gag…ok that’s better than UGH. Even the hands are ugh/gag.

and here’s what the screen writer has to say: “Shapiro says he’s only seen the end result once, at the premiere, and only left his name on the project because of the fat check he received. “I can’t help but be strangely proud of it,” he writes. “Out of all the sucky movies, mine is the suckiest.” http://gawker.com/5503834/battlefield-earth-screenwriter-apologizes-for-suckiest-movie-ever

No more —not even Cat Woman..

“I made some truly awful movies. Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot was the worst. If you ever want someone to confess to murder just make him or her sit through that film. They will confess to anything after 15 minutes.” Sylvester Stallone

11″ Round Etched Glass Platter Hellerware on a 12″ Wooden… $20.75

I KNOW I’ve used the scene before but I love a nicely done water scene—YES if you look closely there is water in the picture

A bit on the filming: http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-news/television-smash-hit-outlander-set-9614373

if you haven’t tried it here are some reason why you should: http://www.sbs.com.au/guide/article/2016/10/18/time-travel-passion-and-kilts-why-you-absolutely-must-watch-outlander

10 more cool things about Outlander: http://www.sbs.com.au/guide/article/2016/10/18/time-travel-passion-and-kilts-why-you-absolutely-must-watch-outlander

“I have never seen the film (Jaws 2: The Revenge), but by all accounts it was terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built, and it is terrific.” Michael Caine